Hola Mom, and Mother-in-Law, and other good, faithful Christian readers. Just in case your pulse is starting to escalate because of my racy title…don’t worry. No scandelous details will be included in this post. Quite frankly, there are no scandelous details to filter anyway. 😛
The church we just joined (shout-out FBCMW!) just started a new bible study (although, come to think of it, there haven’t been any bible verses in the first two chapters…hum…) on Wednesday nights. The study is on the book “10 Great Dates to Energize Your Marriage” by David and Claudia Arp. Everyone going through the study shows up at 6:30, we have a 30 minute group discussion/video session, then (ideally) it’s off on your date! Date requirements are pretty minimal, so you can go anywhere/do anything…preferably with no kids, cell phones off, and no movies. There are a series of questions to get you talking, and a challenge here or there for your marriage.
Sounds fun right?!
The only problemo? Chris has class on Wednesday night.
The solution to that one was pretty easy actually. NO, I don’t leave him out and go on dates by myself. 😛 I just go by myself to the study, get the info, then we can go out on a different night. And it’s only slightly awkward that I’m at a couples bible study all by myself.
Our first date was about as simple as it can get. On the drive home this past weekend we picked up the always-delish Taco Bell, stopped at what I have deemed “The Breakup Park” (sounds bad I know…I’ll have to post about the reason for that on another day…no breakups in today’s story!), and tied the dog to a post so that we could eat in peace.
We even sat right next to each other
because it was so windy that we needed to put our backs to the wind to create a more romantic feel to the date. This way we could also whisper sweet nothings / breathe bean burritoes into one another’s ears. Strangely…so sweet. *blush*
The first set of questions was all about “a walk down memory lane.” Needless to say, we didn’t have far to walk! Pretty easy to remember all of our “firsts,” but fun nonetheless. It definitely reminded me that we’ve had a lot of really, really good times.
Last night was our second date. In a wonderful twist of fate, Chris had the week off of school, so he actually got to go to church with me. (When I walked in I wanted to shout “SEE! He DOES exist!!”) We soooo had to surpress giggles, because the video definitely has the cheese factor going on.
Once we were released…”Go Forth and Date” kind of thing…we decided to head to the new hotspot in town. Pastafina! I know, I know…it’s sad when that’s the hotspot. But it just opened this week, and we’ve been pretty pumped to try it. We tried to predict how many other couples from the class would do the same thing, but both of us kind of overshot the number…we only ran into one other couple there.
On the way we started talking about today’s conversation points, which was all about talking! (Isn’t that so metacognitive of us…talking about talking.) One of the forms of communication that the authors talked about learning to do without was “confrontive.” It is exactly what it sounds like, so I don’t think any further explaination is necessary. 😉
A strategy for overcoming the “confrontive communication” was to have a buzz phrase to say to your partner when you feel like you are being attacked by their words. The idea is that once you’ve let them know how you are feeling, your partner can approach the conversation in a different way, change his/her tone, etc.
Their phrase was “Ouch! I feel a pinch.”
Chris wanted ours to be “banana phone.”
I mean…what?! Are you kidding me? We almost had a confrontive conversation right there in the car! (Hehe…not really, but he wouldn’t get off of the banana phone thing!)
Sometimes I find that the best way to combat his random streaks is to fight fire with fire. When he wouldn’t stop saying “Banana Phone” I counterattacked by saying I wanted the buzz word to be “Hamburger Phone.” (I did not make that up either…the niggling in your brain tells you that you’ve seen a hamburger phone before. Let me help you clear the fog. TV Show: Full House, Character: Kimmie Gibbler) See the hamburger phone below:
And guess what? My evil plan worked! Although we did not actually come up with a buzz phrase to stop the drama, he did stop saying “Banana Phone”…mostly because he was so confused about how a hamburger could be a phone. GENIUS!
It took us a few minutes to get settled in once we arrived at the restaurant as well. Our waiter was channeling his inner Italian, saying things like “Bonjour”…even though his name was Tim. I wanted to rename him Lorenzo or something. (
Tim Lorenzo was a very impressive waiter by the way. Che meraviglia!)
Then there was the awkward moment where I thought Chris was *sniffing* the menu. Turns out his contacts were bothering him and he couldn’t quite see. Sniffing, squinting, tomato, tamato.
The rest of our meal was truly a blessing though. We ate too much food (all super good by the way), treated ourself to a canoli (Chris had to correct me when I tried to order ‘cannaloni” instead…my bad), and enjoyed great conversation about the way we communicate and feel about one another. I’m a pretty lucky girl…my man isn’t afraid to talk about emotions. I love him for it!
So far I’d say that I’m really diggin’ my husband, and really diggin’ this study! Anybody have any fun date ideas for us to try out? Comment below!
KEEP CALM & DATE YOUR HUSBAND!